Serious illness like cancer affects couple relationships, family life and friendships. Sometimes the illness brings people closer; sometimes it creates distance. The impact of cancer on one’s family depends on which family member is ill, the age of the children, responsibility for finances, looking after the children and many other things have to be reevaluated.

Impacts and  stretches the emotional resources of the rest of the immediate and extended family. Very important that both the person with cancer and loved ones protect one another from their own emotions. More openly they can discuss tough issues, the greater the scope for family members to support one another. If family members can’t manage to work things out among themselves then they should get family therapy or some other third party help.

How to tell children about cancer?

Good if in addition to their parents, children also have a safe adult who they can rely on when the situation demands. Also important to inform other adults, such as day care staff or a teacher at school, who have dealings with the child about the illness.

For an young adults, a loved one’s illness can be especially difficult, as the family crisis coincides with big changes in their development. They are preoccupied with thoughts about their sexuality, values, questions about the hereditariness of the disease, death, and so on. A young person’s reactions to a parent’s illness may be extreme, involving rage, feeling ashamed of the parent or by closing up. Despite this, with a young person it is important to talk about the illness openly and honestly.

If a child becomes ill

For parents, having a child diagnosed with cancer is a devastating experience. It often prompts feelings of guilt, even though there is nothing they could have done to prevent the illness. It is important to try to help the child live as normal and varied life as possible despite the illness.

Friends 

Friends give support during illness. They can help you to stay positive and strong. The one who has fallen ill can talk honestly to his or her friends. Some cancer patient find that their circle of friends changes during the illness. For a variety of reasons: Some may stop being in touch because they don’t know what they should say to someone with cancer and are unable to face them. Possibly the person who is ill may withdraw socially, or then again, it may be due to anxiety but also physical factors, if the illness and its treatment interfere with patients normal life. Having a severe illness can alter your values and view of life, and so your friendships may also alter.